Aside from our famous BBQ, we make the South's Best South African biltong! Chubby's second cousin twice removed was Maghiel Van Kundz - renowned in South Africa as the Blubbery Biltong King. We inherited his recipe and prepare and age it in our state-of-the-art facilities, somewhere in Georgia.

Don't forget Fido! Choosing only the meatiest morsels and veggies, we mince, grind and package pre-dog-poo for your favorite hound. You can trust us to make your dog's turd royalty!

As Chubby can't help but show - in his Vegan logo, he wasn't that impressed with the idea of a Vegan product range, until he realized by doing so, the veg get it too! Is asparagus your thing? A big aubergine maybe? We will keep you sated whilst keeping you regular. Just because it didn't previously have a face, it doesn't mean we can't eat it!

Poor Fido! He's blushing, tackling that particular itch, and neither you or the carpet is happy! It's time to take him to a licensed CK's franchise to get that sheeeit sorted out! Look for CK's Butt Squeeze franchise locations - they're growing so fast they're literally exploding!

We all have our off days, why not expand your mind - and more - with one of our non-custom fitted butt plugs? Licensed to thrill, fashioned in Wuhan from prime butt plug asbestos, these babies are being sucked up fast! So don't delay!

After crafting the rhyming masterpiece "You know you stink, show me the pink", CK Enterprises ventured into song writing for many famous artists. We're not at liberty to reveal who, but should you need a tune - crafted by our team of lyrical geniuses - just be sure to holler now, d'hear!

Every lady needs a little help, sometimes. CK's Sanitary Towels and CK's Pocket Rockets are discretely packaged in handy 25 x 25-to-go packs, wheels included. Made from 5% Georgia cotton and 95% Xinjiang cotton, these are free of all human rights abuse and just simply fit the bill, as Barbara from San Diego testified: "the things are wizard for my wizard's sleeve - highly recommended!".

Sometimes, going back to basics with just a tinge of possible failure, is the way to go. Here at CK's we don't believe in wasting any part of the pig, and that means the guts too! We use what we can for our sausage casings, but there's always enough left over for you to use on your own sausage! Available in small and extra-small, single or double layered, these puppies are certain to fail at some point! Go on, play Russian Roulette - maybe you won't procreate and the World will have one less mouth to feed!

Need knickers? Git u sum Kundzerwear! These tight fitting Y-front inspired panties are skillfully honed from old hessian peanut sacks, sourced from deep southern Georgia. We bleach them on the banks of the Chattahoochee river, just upstream from Atlanta Metro, releasing the byproducts carefully into the water supply. Clam Chowder or Klam Kosy? At CK's, we know what we prefer!

Pigs equals spare ribs, right?  Fried bats equals pandemics! Here at CK's, we embrace the eastern culinary arts, so have started to package our takeaway menu special ribs and bats from our USDA decertified packaging plant next to Rubin's Kosher Abattoir in downtown Atlanta. We're hoping for a steady supply of parts soon, they apparently have no need for the spare bits (or the rest). Look out for our branded CK packages in a freezer aisle near you - for you to takeaway yourself! Franchise brick-and-mortar opportunities happening in the very distant future.

We call is a new twist on pulled pork, others don't. CK's is proud to offer its stud services in lieu of our previous dubious cloning method. But no worries, we're reusing the test tubes! Let CK sire your next brood! Cryogenically frozen in our bioweaponry labs, CK's special sauce is ready for shipment, defrosting and swift installation at your end. Our skilled "pwankers" assure quality over quantity. Git u sum before it gits u!

Here at CK's, our "multi-purpose" labs are utilized along the same protocols as in Wuhan, China, to "study and make cultures" of hazardous microbes. We don't let this stuff out in the wild, NO. OK, we may have accidentally lent a small perfume bottle's worth to some Russians to place on doorknobs in Southern England, but that was a pure mistake! So, no, that person or group of people who you just love to hate are not getting any of CK's carefully isolated bio-materiel! Well, unless it gets loose in a meat market, nearby - or in fact - not even nearby!

Darn it, things can get loose out there! But rest assured, as The Prodigy sang "I got the poison, I got the remedy", so do we! Our expansive range of unnecessary antidotes are available from CK Labs at astronomical prices! Guaranteed to maybe, possibly work, look no further next time you and/or a friend visit a meat market that sells fried bats, and start to feel a tad sick. Just contact CK's, we will git u sum (for the right price).

Cooking is, of course, coursing through or veins hare at CK's. We realized early on into our ventures that we need the correct culinary attire, and critically, good shoes to stop slipping on all the entrails etc., that are the eventual byproduct of our craft. Chubby Kundz Koch Schuhe are available in yellow, brown, black, white and ribbed rainbow - one size fits all!

Who doesn't like a little bit of slap and tickle?! For sure, we do at CK's! If porking is your thing, we have the group for you - a wide range of open minded couples ready to "Schwing with the Schwein" whenever the moment arises! Simply sign up and login to our highly insecure website and enter your credit card information and any pictures you'd really not like to be public, and voila, you can rest assured and leave the rest to us! 

Our recently discovered talent, a 60-year-old Decatur resident -  whose first name will be kept secret as a teaser - has signed a lifelong binding plus postmortem, non-terminating contract with CK's Enterprises, to perform and delight you with his melodic charisma. Guaranteed to not know most of the lyrics, Barry will leave you stunned and in awe of his highly honed vocal cords. You won't believe it until you hear it, y'hear! Don't worry if you miss Barry before he expires, we will be CGI-ing him just like George Lucas did with Carrie Fisher!

CK's luxury island in the Indonesian archipelago is a place you can vacay and relax! Although previously made famous by the novel "Lord of the Flies", you won't find any pig heads on sticks at this top-notch gaff, trust us! Visit the grave site of Piggy, the porcine kid that caught the wrong end of a rock back in the day! Dare to dip your toes in constantly varying pH ocean, walk barefoot on our polluted oil sand beaches; scuba the bleached corals! You can be reassured all seafood on Porker Rico contains additional microplastic particles for your gastronomic edification!

F**k you, Elon, you ain't seen nuthin' yet! Just ask "Bachman Turner Overdrive"! CK's SpaceY launch site, on a peninsula on Porker Rico offers easy access and an ideal orbital apogee for space tourism. Fueled by 100% bio-waste and pig shite, our spacecraft, the CV-Shart V is completely unrecyclable but extensively beta tested via our Trump-era "repatriation flights" (although feedback sensors failed to really confirm so). Now in service, we've exchanged the cages for plush pleather seats! Come and let us woo you on a 4 minute 34 second orbital flight, soon! We're hopeful you'll splash down, water-wise!

F**k you, Elon, again! Call that a transportation system for the future? At CK's, we scoff at your attempts! Our nascent Kundzerloop transportation system uses existing sewer pipes to project you at unimagined speeds, so much so that it'll be amazing that you survive the massive deacceleration! Just think - Atlanta (our bio-weaponry lab being the terminus)  to Kansas City (Matt's apartment) in just over a second, and 3 seconds in total to San Francisco! Ten seconds to Porker Rico!  At CK's, we care about the planet, Kundzerloop is all about speed and reusing existing infrastructure. You suck Elon!

Feeling a little down? Let's turn that frown upside down! CK's Psych Services takes a holistic approach to mental health. Our team of trained agitators and naysayers utilize reverse psychology to fool the brain into thinking "they can't possibly be this nasty, right, its a joke?". It is no joke. It might work, you may stay the same or get worse. Frankly, we don't care.

Is the missus on again about you turning off the jizz-wrigglerz? Typical, the pill makes her porky, so all she has to do is go for major surgery and have her fallopians tied in a wad, but oh no, that's not going to happen is it!   Don't worry fella, we've got you covered. As trained culinary experts equipped with the necessary tools to dismember most animals, one of our skillful "chefs" will delicately remove the source of the female irritation and also cut your vas deferens! No job too small!